What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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