That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
