seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
