she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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