Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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