I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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