Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Can I color on your dick again?
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
