I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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