No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize