So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Randomize
