HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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