stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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