'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
