Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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