if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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