please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
