i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
