Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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