North Korea, Best Korea!
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Randomize