i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
