I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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