you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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