I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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