I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
