we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize