how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Floor bacon is actually really good
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
