you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
