Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
