i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
