i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
