it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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