Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I touched a dick in church today
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
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