FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
