I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
