haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
