I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize