you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
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