Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
