We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
