dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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