why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
