All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
