I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
