Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
