Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize