hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
either way he was missing a nipple.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
