I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
