go do what you do best...puke behind churches
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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