I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Is Oprah even human
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
