quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
